So you’ve been lifting weights and eating like you are single handedly trying to make certain species of animal go extinct. Congratulations, you should be fairly huge by now. There is just one problem with this newly found level of man gorilla you have acquired, you now have a tiny dick! Just kidding, the real problem is that you now start to notice lagging body parts. Your calves might be too small. Your upper pecs are underdeveloped. Maybe your ab definition resemble that of a smooth turtle shell. Whatever the problem, we all have certain body parts they we don’t give enough attention.
The thing is though, there are certain body parts that the majority of guys ignore and don’t even realize it, or even worse, just don’t care to work them. That’s what I want to talk about today. The bodybuilders out there who have overcome their chicken legs but ignore the fact that Richard Simmons has a thicker neck than them.
So foregoing any more dick joke filled intro, let’s discuss the most commonly ignored body parts.
1. The Neck.
Of course this would be the first entry. This is one of the major body parts that guys willingly ignore. I mean, I can’t tell you the last time I performed a strictly neck only exercise. Neck workouts are for wrestlers and porn stars. Why should the average Joe Q. Bodybuilder worry about it?
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Well for one thing, you kind of need a strong neck to you know, not die if you were in some kind of accident. Also, it looks pretty ridiculous when you see a hugely built guy with massive traps walking around with this tiny, pencil thin, no girth having neck. Chicks dig a dude with good neck game, or so the hip-hop memes comment sections tell me anyway.
The moral is, do some damn neck exercises once in awhile. You don’t have to look like Brock Lesnar, but settling for a young Bill Goldberg is acceptable. Who wants to be able to wear turtleneck sweatshirts anyway? Not this guy.
2. Shin muscles.
What kind of bullshit is this Caleb? I’ll tell you what manner of bullplop this is. You know how much it sucks to get shin splints? Well there is a muscle there that you can build up to help avoid that lame ass injury.
Doing a reverse calf raise will build that muscle up and besides just helping avoid injury, it will actually make your calves stand out a bit more. What I mean by reverse calf raise is that you sit down, extend your leg out in front of you with your foot flat against the floor, and raise your foot and toes upward. I do this at the end of leg day with a 25 lb dumbbell sitting on my foot and it really works the muscle running along the outer front shin. I got ripped shins fool and it looks awesome. Try it! (I just googled shin exercises and there are a few more exercises out there you can do. Look it up and get to learning suckas!)
3. Grip strength, Wrist, and Forearms.
I grouped these together because most exercises you do specifically for one of these affects all of them. This is another one most amateur bodybuilders actively ignore. They figure deadlifts and heavy shrugs will cover it. No, you need more if you really want to develop this area.
It looks stupid if you have these giant boulder sized arms and below the elbow sits a wet macaroni noodle. I know it’s boring as hell but do yourself a favor, do exercises at the end of some workouts that specifically train these three things.
My grip strength has always been a problem for me. Before a back injury I was deadlifting 415 easy without chalk or wraps. The only reason I couldn’t lift more weight was my grip strength. I’ve started using those heavy duty hand grippers, I do zottman curls, finger strengthening exercises, there are so many things you can incorporate into your workouts. Don’t be that guy with tiny forearms and weak wrist, make sure to work them out often. (Insert fapping joke here.)
Who cares about a geometrical shape? Classy bus stop skanks, that’s who. This muscle group sits in the upper middle back and even though you work it out with a lot of back exercises, chances are you don’t try to specifically target them.
More than just trying to make these muscles huge, and you want to make them huge by the way, these are something you should focus on in order to develop the rest of your body. Weak rhomboids means shitty posture, back pain, and diminished strength. Much like any other major muscle group, you need to build them up in order to get the most gains possible from your workouts.
The main thing with working out the rhomboids is that you need to focus on a lot of stretching and making sure they don’t tighten up over time. Building them up will make your back look amazing but many guys ignore trying to keep the muscles flexible. Try benching or doing deads when you have tight lady rhomboids on your back. It’s no good.
5. Ankle Muscles.
“I don’t give a shit about ankle muscles! Bitches never even see my ankles.” Says a typical meathead wearing old school zebra pants. Yes, building up your ankle muscles will not really help your aesthetics. It will help with strength and posture though. Building ankle strength is very important in keeping your body aligned. It helps keep your knees, hips, and back stay in line.
I’m truly amazed by how many people ignore their ankles. Even professional sports athletes ignore them and they need flexible, strong ankled to do their fucking job! Steph Curry use to get made fun of because he had weak ass ankles.
Why should bodybuilders focus on them though? Is not like they are running or jumping a lot. Well do you perform heavy squats? How about deadlifts? It would kind of suck to try those with weak ankles now wouldn’t it. don’t be a bitch, spend some time working on your ankles. Just simple stretching, jumping jacks, barefooted squats, and tip toe walking can make a world of difference.
Well there you have it. Some things that shouldn’t be ignored if you want to be a true animal. I’m gonna go do some manly lumberjack type shit now but before I go, I want to give you a quick list of other muscles you didn’t know you could build up. These ones you might want to ignore though.
Jaw muscles. Unless you are Killer Croc, you probably don’t need to be able to bite through a human skull. You can build up your bite strength though which will make you have a muscular jaw. Doesn’t look very good though.
Pelvis muscles. Yes you can build your pelvis muscles doing kegel exercises. This will give you the ability to last longer during sex, shoot a load long distances, and make your penis dance around by flexing the pelvis muscles. Wait, you should definitely work on these. I don’t know why I didn’t add this as an entry to the damn article.
Forehead muscles. You can build the shit out your forehead. Somehow attach weight to your eyebrows and do eyebrow raises. I don’t know what the end result of intense forehead training would be but damnit if I don’t want to find out. Well, watch someone else find out. I don’t want a six pack on my forehead.
Butthole. Stand outside of a gas station and wink that brown eye furiously at whoever walks by.
Ears. People can wiggle their ears and it’s very strange. Humans use to have muscles there and we evolved to not have them anymore. Some people still have slight use of them though and I’m sure it can be harnessed for hilarious purposes.
Eyeballs. They don’t move on there own! They have muscles that spin those magic orbs around. Work on the muscles that move them and I’m sure something weird will happen. I’m not doing it though. Somebody get heavy contacts and roll your eyeballs around. Do this everyday for a month and report back to me on the results.